Praise and Fear

     I'm one of the guys leading the Praise and Worship on a retreat about a month from now and I think that music is one of the greatest gifts of prayer that God has given me. I'm ADD so a lot of times when I'm praying I lose track of my thoughts and I end up just kind of starting my prayer back where I last remembered. Now, I realize that of course there's nothing terribly wrong with getting distracted and I'll always remember what Sr Celestina said once, "You know that God treasures every time you turn your attention back to Him in prayer." This is true, but I enjoy musical praise because it helps me to let go and get a grasp on how I can never get a grasp on the glory of God.

     Through music God can reveal Himself in the beauty of an instrument or a voice and through the truth found in lyrics. Recently, I have re-fallen in love with Matt Maher's song "Sing Over Your Children" and particularly the very beginning:

"My fear grips my faith,

And I am left unmoved."

     What a depressing part to choose right? But isn't there so much truth packed in there that all of us can relate to? There are a million things to say but I'll be quite brief.

Fear. It's what stops me from doing the right thing the majority of the time. It's what stops me from going out of my way to do good things (that and laziness). What are we so afraid of? Why does actually living in a different way than other people absolutely freak us out? I think it is the dumbest thing ever that I can't work up the courage to do something crazy out of the ordinary unless someone else is doing it with me. I'm frustrated that I can't do things without being in fear of judgment - and not judgement by someone by someone uncreated who matters, like um... God, but rather I prioritize petty judgements by ordinary created human beings.

"To fear is not cowardly; it is in our nature. To act in fear of human opinion 

rather than the Truth of God is the definition cowardly." 

 That's a quote by me, from just now...it might not actually qualify as a quote. I'm done.